from Parenting & Family
By Linda Harvey
(Reprinted by permission from "Choice 4 Truth," www.choice4truth.com)
An examination of the values of PFLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays), a national group promoting the acceptance of "gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered" lifestyles for children and teens.
December, 2002 -- PFLAG is active on a local and national level attempting to infuse its radical ideas into schools, churches, youth organizations and into national and state public policy. There is growing support for the work of this organization, which is being received cordially by some schools and even corporations.
Yet behind its rhetoric of "rights" and "tolerance" is the sordid reality of what PFLAG actually supports. As their recommended literature reveals, the world according to PFLAG would encourage children to be self-indulgent and self-centered; to reject the wisdom of parents and other authorities if they wish, even at early ages; and to engage in just about any sexual behavior imaginable.
In this literature, there is even implied approval of sexual contact between adults with minors. It's a frequent, usually "positive" theme in many resources recommended by PFLAG. For a complete listing of these resources, consult the group's publications on its web site at www.pflag.org.
Warning: Graphic sexual content follows. The following are just a small sample of the situations, opinions and themes depicted in the PFLAG brochures and in books PFLAG recommends as "resources." The passages included here are mild compared to the obscene, self-destructive, abusive, and just plain weird material that predominates. The sheer volume is grounds, we believe, for preventing this group from having any contact with minor children; nor should its ideas be adopted by teachers, counselors and parents. There is a dire need to expose this organization's roots. Schools and organizations that utilize PFLAG materials, list its web site or other contact points as resources, or allow PFLAG representatives to speak to children or other groups may find themselves ultimately exposed to criminal liability.
1. PFLAG's recommended literature encourages in sexual license for people of all ages. For children, this means that virtually any sexual activity as well as exposure to graphic sexual images and material, is not just permissible, but good for children, as part of the process of discovering their sexuality.
"I've been doing drag for about ten years, on and off....my fantasies were all about whipping. I started reading up on S/M, and it was making me interested in sex for the first time...I realized that, for what I was doing, I could be getting good money." (Interview with Minal, a young man who is a cross-dresser and works as a prostitute specializing in sado-masochism, in Revolutionary Voices, Ed. Amy Sonnie, Alyson Books, 2000, pp.171-172. Book recommended for youth by PFLAG in its brochure, "Be Yourself").
"...From a convenience store in a town thirty miles away that sold liquor to underage customers as well as porn paperbacks, I acquired a copy of a novel called Pretty Boys Must Die. It satisfied my curiosity about what homosexuals did....I was excited out of my mind....I also knew that somewhere out there, beyond Amethyst, someone had to be doing something remotely like what leather hustler Riley Jacks did to na•ve young David (the "Pretty Boy")....I was ready.....But I had to wait. ...I gorged on new porn when I could get it...I was content to read for hours, and masturbate for hours..." (A man reminiscing about his youth, from Growing Up Gay/Growing Up Lesbian, ed. Bennett Singer, New Press, 1994, p.53. This book is part of recommended reading by PFLAG in its brochure for parents, "Our Daughters & Sons.")
"Except for her Adam's apple, it was hard to tell Christina was really a young male from the Philippines...My days were spent as a man and my nights as a woman...Christina introduced me to Breezy. She had started taking hormones when she was in her teens...During our physical lovemaking, Breezy was able to express her female and male energies at the same time...I was sad that our affair lasted only four days." (Memoir of transgendered youth Shu Wei Chen/ Andy, pp.179-180, in Bi Any Other Name, ed. Loraine Hutchins & Lani Kaahumanu, Alyson Books, 1991. Recommended in the PFLAG Bisexuality Resource Packet and in the PFLAG brochure for parents.)
In the novel Rainbow Boys (Alex Sanchez, Simon & Schuster, 2001), three 17-year old boys explore their homosexual attractions. Frequent themes include obtaining pornographic magazines (p.51) and movies (p.88), as well as graphic descriptions of masturbation (pp.51-52, 70, 89). The book features several scenes of explicit heterosexual sex, and a scene where one of the teen boys has anal intercourse without a condom with a 29-year-old man he has just met via the Internet (p.148). This boy's mom is an officer of the local PFLAG chapter, and comes and goes to meetings throughout the book. Rainbow Boys is recommended by PFLAG in its brochure for youth, "Be Yourself."
"...I met this guy named Reggie, who was twenty-three. I met him hanging out in the subway station....He spent the night with me a few times..." (Memoir from 'D.B.', a 15 year-old runaway and school drop-out, in Two Teenagers in Twenty, Ed. Ann Heron, Alyson Books,1994, page 81. Book recommended by PFLAG in its brochure for youth.)
"By age twelve, I had become a porn aficionado, since the couple for whom I babysat and my older brother kept copies of the magazines around. I must say that I came in touch with my bisexuality, or my bisexual feelings, through men's pornography." (Lucy Friedland in Bi Any Other Name [cited above], p.292.)
"Well, I'm politically radical...And I'm also sexually radical. I support all people's rights, all lifestyles that are consensual and not coercive. I have many friends in the S & M community and in the transsexual and transvestite communities...I'm a prostitute's rights advocate..." (Marcy Sheiner, Bi Any Other Name [cited above], p.206.)
"I am a triracial, First Nation, Two-Spirit Fairy Trans Faggot activist...I am committed to unleashing Out/rage/us Acts of Delightful Revolution." (Qwo-Li Driskill, age 22, in Revolutionary Voices [cited above], p.198.)
"'My first experience was with a much older man, a friend of Derek's [his dad]...When I was fifteen, he must have been twenty-nine, thirty...I seduced him...It was a wild night. We did everything.'" (Young man, Eliot, telling about earlier experiences in a story excerpted in Growing Up Gay/Growing Up Lesbian [cited above], p.111.)
2. "Coming out" (calling oneself homosexual or cross-dressing) at a very young age, and even beginning early homosexual sex practices, is a desirable goal in the world according to PFLAG.
"I first began to come out when I was 11. In terms of my family, I was fortunate because my parents have always been accepting of my sexual identity....So at the age of 12 I came out to my entire elementary school, which included grades K-8." (Fifteen-year-old girl writing in Revolutionary Voices, ed. By Amy Sonnie, Alyson Books, 2000, pp.43-44. Recommended for youth in PFLAG's brochure, "Be Yourself.")
"My name is Nicole, and I'm a lesbian. I'm twelve years old." (From Two Teenagers in Twenty, [cited above], p.167.)
"Young people are just as capable of exploring or asserting their sexual identity as adults." (Author Mary L Gray, in In Your Face: Stories From the Lives of Queer Youth, Harrington Park Press,1999, p.23. Book recommended by PFLAG in both its youth and parent brochures.)
"Last summer, I finally came to grips with the fact that I was gay. I had been having sex with a man since I was fourteen, but I thought it was just a phase..." (Mike Friedman, age 17, in Two Teenagers in Twenty [cited above], p.134.)
PFLAG strongly supports "transgendered" behaviors (being a transvestite or having a sex change through hormones or surgery). This includes supporting young children in their rights to dress, and to believe they are, the opposite sex. See the PFLAG brochure, "Our Trans Children," available for order on the PFLAG web site, www.pflag.org.
" I identify as bisexual, and have since I was about six or seven...I sort of experimented when I was young." (Eriq Chang, writing in In Your Face: Stories From the Lives of Queer Youth [as cited above], p.32.)
"I used to go down in the cellar with other boys...I have a twin brother, Chad, who is also gay...When I was seventeen, I came out to my brother and his lover...They were in bed, and I just came in and blurted it all out...I'd been very sexually active since I was twelve." (Kyle Dale Bynion, age 18, writing in Two Teenagers in Twenty, pp.16-17 [cited above]).
3. Bisexuality, fluid sexuality and sexual experimentation is encouraged by PFLAG. The group believes it's important for all students to learn about these options.
"At some point, almost everybody gets a 'crush' on someone of the same sex...One or two sexual experiences with someone of the same sex may not mean you're gay, either--just as one or two sexual experiences with someone of the opposite sex may not mean you're straight...many straight people have same-sex sexual experiences.....Dr. Alfred Kinsey, the world's best-known sex researcher, concluded from his research that almost nobody is purely straight or gay..." (From PFLAG brochure for youth, "Be Yourself", p.5).
"Although it's common to feel more strongly attracted to one sex or the other, many people feel at least some amount of attraction for both sexes. Alfred Kinsey, the famous researcher of sexual behavior, found that our attractions and our sexual behaviors are seldom absolute..." (Passage continues to describe the Kinsey Scale, a 0 through 6 continuum from heterosexual to homosexual, that discredited researcher Kinsey used to describe "fluid" sexuality. In Free Your Mind: The Book for Gay, Lesbian, and Bisexual Youth and Their Allies, Ellen Bass & Kate Kaufman, HarperPerennial, 1996, pp.6-7. Recommended by PFLAG in both its youth and parent brochures.)
"My sexuality is as fluid, infinite, undefinable, and ever-changing as the north-flowing river...Sexuality is not black or white...it is gray...I know that defining myself is not so simple..." (T. Rowan, 16, in Revolutionary Voices [cited above], p.167.)
"'...You never wanted to, like, do it with a girl?' 'No, I guess I'm a Kinsey six.'" (Two boys discuss the Kinsey scale in the novel Rainbow Boys [cited above], p.95.)
"Last night, I told my friend Leslie that I am gay--after I had sex with her...." (From a homosexual man's diary of his youth, in Growing Up Gay/Growing Up Lesbian, [cited above], pp.80-81.)
"For gay liberation to have any value for youth, people must be reminded, preferably in fifth- or sixth-grade sex education classes, that gay is not only good, but probably a part of most sexual make-ups." (Bill Andriette, age 16, in Two Teenagers in Twenty, [cited above], p.171.)
"Humans are diverse, and individual sexual feelings and behavior change over time....Bisexuality threatens the accepted way of looking at the world by calling into question the validity of rigid sexual categories, and encourages acknowledgement of the existence of a diverse range of sexuality... It is important to have the freedom to choose the type of sexual and affectional relationships that are right for the people involved, whatever their sexual orientation." (PFLAG Bisexuality Resource Packet, pages 4-5.)
"I think the first time I thought about being bi or questioned my sexuality was when, under the influence, I kissed a girl. I would have been thirteen...I was really heavily into drugs and stuff like that..." (Paige, age 18, in In Your Face: Stories from the Lives of Queer Youth [cited above], p.42.)
"No one knows exactly how human sexual orientation--gay or straight--is determined." (From PFLAG youth brochure, "Be Yourself")
4. Meeting with other "gay" and "questioning" youth, usually without parental knowledge, is a frequent theme in PFLAG materials. At these community meetings, thirteen-year-olds will come into contact with college-age youth and adults practicing homosexuality.
"The night I got back from my first support group meeting, I lied to my mother about where I'd been. And I was horrible at lying because I had a good relationship with my mother..." (Dawn, age 17, in In Your Face: Stories From the Lives of Queer Youth, [cited above], p.50.)
"...I finally got up the courage to attend a meeting of PRYSM. PRYSM is a sort of support group for lesbians and gays aged twenty-two and under....That meeting was the catalyst for my new life as a lesbian...My mother is the last person I would tell...." (Robin, age 16, in Two Teenagers in Twenty [cited above], pp.131-132.)
"Jason Carillo walked around the block a third time, working up his courage to go into the brownstone....He'd read about the group for teens in his school newspaper...." (Opening scene of novel Rainbow Boys, which is about three boys who meet at a "gay" youth meeting. Cited above, p.1)
"I came out when I was fifteen. I started going to a gay youth group at the MCC church. I found an incredible amount of support there..." (Aimee Anderson, 17, in Two Teenagers in Twenty [cited above], p.50.)
"I was in sixth grade and attending a Catholic school in San Francisco when I came out to a small group of people...During this time I started attending LYRIC, the Lavender Youth Recreation and Information Center, a wonderful program and hang-out space for LGBT youth in San Francisco....The next year I was in seventh grade..." (Gina De Vries, age 15, in Revolutionary Voices [cited above], p.43)
"...I joined this youth group called Positive Images; it's the Sonoma County gay/lesbian/bisexual youth group. I got a boyfriend instantly; he picked me up right away, right when I joined the group. He was older; he was twenty-five, I was sixteen...." (Todd Fay-Long, age 17, from In Your Face: Stories from the Lives of Queer Youth [cited above], p.58.)
"Slowly but surely, I came out to my priest. I was in shock when he said, 'That's fine...' He was the most supportive person I've ever met....My priest told me about this support group in Boston where there are a lot of kids like me...I'll never forget that first day at the Boston Alliance of Gay and Lesbian Youth (BAGLY)..." (Troix Reginald Bettencourt, age 18, Lowell, Massachusetts, looking back on his high school days, in Two Teenagers in Twenty [cited above], pp.158-159.)
5. PFLAG spreads false information about the Bible, religious faith, and restoration of heterosexuality through faith. This misinformation closes the door of change for many young people, and stirs up anti-Christian and anti-Jewish bias and hostility.
"In fact, the Bible says very little about homosexuality. Amidst the hundreds of thousands of other teachings, responsibilities, laws and prohibitions, there are only a handful of statements that might possibly apply to sex between men--and none that address lesbian sexuality." (Erroneous claim that ignores Romans 1:26 and many clear passages prohibiting homosexuality, from Free Your Mind: The Book for Gay, Lesbian, and Bisexual Youth--and Their Allies [cited above], p.279.)
"We were observant Jews--conservative...We were aware that ...the Old Testament prohibited ..gay relationships...However, we didn't have a problem reconciling these views because our kids always come first." (From PFLAG brochure, Faith in Our Families, p.2).
"My parents found out I was a lesbian and sent me to a psychologist to be 'cured.' I am presently being cured, not of my sexual orientation, but of the way I accepted my parents' every word as gospel." (Joanne, age 18, in Two Teenagers in Twenty, [cited above], p.42)
"Later that week, Kyle arrived home from school to find his mom standing in the center of his bedroom...She barraged him with questions like, Should she have done something different bringing him up? or, What about the ex-gay groups that claimed homosexuals could change? 'Mom,' he said, frustrated. 'You didn't do anything wrong and I can't change. Those groups are full of fakes...'" (From novel Rainbow Boys, [cited above] p.103.)
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