from Books & Reviews
By Frank York
June 22, 2004 - Two openly-gay physicians--one a pediatrician and one a psychiatrist--have written a parenting advice book on the sexual development of children. Authors Mark A. Schuster and Justin Richardson's book, Everything you NEVER wanted your kids to know about Sex (but were afraid they'd ask), was published in a paperback version by Three Rivers Press, a division of Crown Publishing Company/Random House.
Dr. Richardson has been a long-time promoter of homosexuality to teenagers and was featured in a NARTH article in September, 2002. Richardson is an assistant professor of psychiatry at Columbia and Cornell University.
Dr. Schuster dedicates his book to his partner, Jeffrey Webb, and is an associate professor of pediatrics at UCLA as well as a researcher at the RAND corporation.
Schuster and Richardson devote Chapter Five to a discussion of the issue of sexual orientation, and they promote the theory that homosexuality is genetic. They refer to the long-discredited twin study, and prepare parents for accepting that their child may be a homosexual who needs love and acceptance.
Other sections of the book deal with sexually active teens, abortion, and sexually transmitted diseases.
Chapter Five--Perpetuating Gay Mythology
Drs. Schuster and Richardson recommend that parents come to terms with the reality that their son or daughter may turn out to be gay. "Consider the possibility that you may have been charged with the responsibility of raising a gay son or daughter."
To the question of whether or not homosexuality is genetic, the authors respond that genes are the only factor known to play a role in sexual orientation--and that there is no evidence whatsoever that parenting influences contribute in any way to a child's sexual identity.
They say: "First and foremost, there is good evidence that genes play a major but not determinative role in shaping your child's sexual orientation. In fact, for all its confusion, the extensive research into the origins of sexual orientation makes one thing clear: The only known vote you have in your child's sexual orientation you cast with an egg or a sperm."
To prove that homosexuality is genetic, the authors cite the discredited twins study. (pages 146-147).
To aid parents in accepting that they may have a gay son or daughter, Drs. Schuster and Richardson recommend parents associate with Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG), an organization reported on at length by NARTH which has published a "recommended reading list for teenagers" of books on witchcraft, sex between adults and children, group sex, and similar practices.
"Do It if You Wish--But Use A Condom Or Dental Dam"
In Chapter Eight, "Ready or Not: Facing the Abstinence Decision," the authors concede that children who have decided to be sexually active must receive guidance from their parents in how to reduce the risks of pregnancies or STDs. The solution to these dilemmas is not for parents to expect premarital abstinence, but to encourage children to use condoms and dental dams whenever engaging in oral, anal, or vaginal sex.
According to Schuster and Richardson, "don't try to prevent" your daughter from having premarital sex. (page 280). "Just teach her. ... Teach her how to think for herself and to make her own choices; and when she does, respect those decisions."
Children should use condoms each time they have anal or vaginal sex, say the authors. In addition, they advise that children should use unlubricated condoms whenever engaging in oral sex, and dental dams for anilingus and cunnilingus when girls having sex with other girls.
Positive Pornography Use For Boys
Drs. Richardson and Schuster deal with the issue of teenage boys using pornography with this advice: "Pornography certainly seems to fill a need. It can open a door to satisfying sexual experiences for teens too inhibited or isolated to enjoy them with others. Although it's been known to stir up the desire to search out sex of the non-solo variety, some kids say they've also found it to be a tool for maintaining abstinence..." (pages 323-24)
The authors recommend that parents who find their teen using pornography a good sex manual that will provide him with how-to information and descriptions of sexual positions.
Let Them Have Sex in the Family Home
According to Richardson and Schuster, parents with a sexually active teen may eventually be asked if the teen can have sex at home instead of in the back set of a car.
The solution? "It seems to us, although we don't know of any research on the subject, that your teenager is more likely to use contraception if he's in a safe and controlled environment, one where he will have had at least a little time to set things up for the occasion and where the atmosphere isn't one of subterfuge. And, hey, maybe this will inspire him to clean up his room." (page 328)
Abortion And Outercourse
Schuster and Richardson describe abortion as one of the most common surgical procedures in the U.S. and list it as one of the solutions to an unwanted pregnancy. After the abortion, parents "may need to mourn a loss - the loss of a baby, the loss of your child's innocence, or the loss of authority over your child." (page 371)
The authors claim that setting a rule for a child to abstain from all sexual activity may not work, but recommend outercourse, which is described as a "measured approach" to the issue of abstinence versus intercourse. (page 374)
Very Bad Advice
All in all, in this reviewer's opinion, Schuster and Richardson's book is filled with chapter upon chapter of very bad advice for parents-- recommending sexual activities that lead to STDs, AIDS infection, abortions, a coarsening culture, broken relationships, disrespect for the uniqueness of marriage, and pornography addiction.